Pushing through things is what I know best, 

 

Whether it be learning from my relatives and elders. 

 

Pushing away my feelings for you has been difficult and I have replaced my emotions with different things. 

 

Now, I’m pushing towards my education and now I’m pushing towards my culture.  

 

Or am I just replacing these feelings I had for you just to keep myself busy from being reminded you're gone. 

 

The only thing that’s my saving grace, is when I see all my relations thrive or simply living.  

 

The youth, elders and everyone in-between, I see them shine.  

 

Someday, I hope to see a resemblance in my daughter’s and son’s eyes and see our ancestors in them.  

 

I just hope that I’m an embodiment of prayers that is still connected to her roots rather than her traumas. 

 

Even when I’m there, am I really? 

 

Or am I just someone who’s just living as a shell of themselves. 

 

At least, I’m a pretty pink conch shell.